So what does age has to do with it?

I’ve been called agist numerous times by some of my friends. That I have an issue with age difference in relationships. Well, I do. Has to do with longevity expectations of a relationship rather than it being right or wrong.

I consider minimizing conflict to be an aim when starting and managing a relationship, with age difference comes challenges that has nothing to do with the size of someone’s brain, their maturity nor their experiences. It’s an issue of the accumulation of years one has had already lived and an issue of what one wants from life at a certain point in time in their lives that will hinder any aspiration of a long-term relationship assuming the two parties are intellectually, emotionally and physically compatible already.

I assume the following as the why we choose to be in romantic relationships:

we want a loving, harmonious, compatible, supportive, emotionally and physically satisfying bond with another human being.

The gap of course grows with the number of years of difference, some would ideally place the gap to up to 7 years, I would think 10-12 is the maximum. Within those age gaps the two would have been children at the same time. Early childhood being 0-7 years while middle childhood 7-12. Also they can still somehow claim they are from the same generation…maybe.

Of course the above is a perspective from some people in their 30’s and 40’s. Would love to hear from other age groups on their experience and thoughts?



Razan Khatib

Razan Khatib

Playing at the intersection of culture, technology, and values. Trying to structure my thoughts and share experiences, learnings, and insights. Co-founder of @spring_apps
Amman, Jordan